Beating is love, scolding is love: Can sex not be gentle?

　　

　　Beating is love, scolding is love

In life, we often hear the jokes between the opposite sexes, "beating is love, scolding is love", which reflects another psychological state between couples, especially during the process of making love. In the words of sexologists, love can be expressed in a non-love form, that is, couples are allowed to have some rough language and actions in their relationship.

So, why can't loving couples do it in a gentle way? It turns out that in daily life, couples with deep feelings often care for each other and treat each other with respect, but when it comes to sex, it becomes different, because if the relationship in daily life is moved over intact, both parties can get pleasure, but the intensity is obviously not enough, and it is too implicit and conservative. In order to stimulate strong pleasure and make sex have a certain tension and explosiveness, it is necessary to require sexual behavior to have a corresponding strength, and to intensify the escalation of pleasure through powerful and violent movements. Take kissing as an example. Kissing is the most common love action between men and women, but with the escalation of sexual pleasure, this gentle action obviously becomes pale and powerless. When the feelings of the two people intensify to the peak stage and they don’t know how to express their feelings, they naturally transform "kiss" into "bite"...

Another interesting phenomenon is that more women than men use grabbing, biting, pinching and other actions during sex. Why is that? Because men are the controllers of sex life, they can put their strength into the actions during the enjoyment, while women do not have this advantage. Although they can take the initiative to participate, they can only accept and wait when it comes to specific actions. When they need to express strong emotions, they have to find other ways, and it is natural for them to engage in grabbing, biting and other actions.

　　Pretty Girl with Ugly Boy

It is not difficult to see such a "scene" on the street: a woman with a very attractive appearance is accompanied by a man with an unattractive appearance. This is the so-called "beautiful woman with an ugly man" phenomenon, which has puzzled people, including scientists. Now there is finally an answer. Researchers have discovered the secret in a fish called "guppy". According to the research of Dr. Dugatkin, a professor at the University of Louisville in the United States, beautiful female guppies usually compete with other female fish to "pursue" a male guppy and show a strong sense of competition, even if the male fish does not look like them. It is speculated that humans may also be the same.

In the study, Dr. Dugatkin tested 60 men and 74 women, showing them photos of strangers and asking them if they would be willing to date the people in the photos. Undoubtedly, every male and female test subject likes people with attractive appearance, but the female test subjects also consider other conditions such as money, sense of humor and kindness in the men they are interested in, while appearance is secondary. Dr. Dugatkin analyzed: "When a woman sees other women flocking to a certain man, she may be driven by vanity and competitive spirit to join the competition, even though the man may not look very ideal."

On the other hand, Dr. Dugatkin pointed out that this study does not mean that women are too concerned about other women's opinions when choosing a mate and are not independent enough. On the contrary, women's opinions are influenced by biological evolution. He believes that paying attention to other women's opinions shows that women are more cautious about marriage and love than men. From the perspective of evolution, women should have such a cautious attitude because once they make a wrong choice, they will pay a greater price for it.

　　Short separation makes the heart grow fonder

There is a saying: A short separation is better than a new marriage. The latest research by sexologists confirms the scientific connotation of this saying - the speed of a man's sperm changes depends largely on the time he spends with his spouse. Research data shows that when a couple stays together all day, the number of sperm in a man's ejaculation is about 389 million, but when they only spend 5% together, the number of sperm in a man's ejaculation reaches 712 million, almost doubling. Scientists call this phenomenon "sperm competition", which provides a scientific and contemporary footnote to the old saying "A short separation is better than a new marriage"...

This change in male semen after separation of men and women reminds us that in order to enhance the attraction between couples and improve the quality of sex, a little "separation" can be very beneficial.

　　No gentleman in bed

A university lecturer always used vulgar language and even dirty words when he made love with his wife, contrary to his usual gentlemanly demeanor. His wife was puzzled: how could a university lecturer who was usually well-mannered and well-spoken suddenly become a hooligan and his character suddenly became so low?

From a psychological point of view, the psychology of men during sex is quite strange. They are intoxicated in this special atmosphere. There is no difference between emperors and beggars. Everyone is naked and there is no need to hide anything. Hence the saying that there are no gentlemen in bed.

Sexual swear words and even dirty words can enhance sexual pleasure to a considerable extent. There are two reasons: First, because they are forbidden by orthodox language, people tend to feel a sense of pleasure when they secretly say them in private. Anthropologists have found that people who say these words above 76% will burst into laughter happily after saying them. This may be the reason why "forbidden fruit is extra sweet". Second, when people say these words, they subconsciously imagine themselves as "carefree" people, thus getting rid of the traditional etiquette and disguise that husbands should be solemn and wives should be serious in sex life, and freely showing their true selves, making excitement and happiness rush in...

In short, men are constantly pursuing "reckless behavior" for pleasure, and once they have tasted the sweetness, they will never give up easily. This is the main reason why men with one wife and several concubines in ancient times, and even emperors with thousands of concubines, would go to prostitutes; it is also the crux of why some men are intellectually disgusted with coquettish and wanton women, but emotionally yearn for them. The key is that prostitutes or sluts act like spoiled brats, use sexual foul language, and flirt without scruples, which wives absolutely cannot and dare not do.